27 Apr 2011

INSTALLING HUSBAND!



 
A woman writes to the IT Technical support.....
 
Dear Tech Support ,
 
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications , which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
 
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 , and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0 , MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1.
 
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
 
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
 
Signed,
 
 
 
REPLY
 
DEAR Madam ,
 
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
 
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update .
If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5...
 
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1.
Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
 
Whatever you do, DO NOT in any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
 
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applicati! ons and will crash Husband 1.0.
 
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software
to improve memory and performance.
We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Good Looks 7.7.
 
Good Luck Madam!

26 Apr 2011

10 Google Labs Experiments You Should Know

1. App Inventor for Android

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It is said that if you want to impress the ladies, buy an iPhone. If your goal is to impress nerds, choose Android. You know what’s cooler? Develop Android applications using App Inventor for Android even if you don’t own an Android phone or have no idea how to program. 

 Visit: App Inventor for Android

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2. Google Fast Flip

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Fast Flip is for people who are easily satisfied by the very best and has little time to search for great online content. It gives users snapshots of controversial, recent, and popular articles from famous news websites. One click, or one swipe, and the next best content is served right in front of you in an instant. No more loading all those web pages in search for what you need, because Fast Flip gives you exactly what you want based on how you customize it.Design is very minimalistic, perfect for researchers and writers and anyone who is concerned about what’s happening in the world.

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3. Aardvark

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It is really frustrating when a question pops in your mind and you can’t have an "almost" instantaneous answer even if you already posted it in an online community (forums, Reddit, Digg, Twitter, Facebook, etc.) where people are always online. The problem might be there’s just no one in there who knows the answer. Solution: Aardvark.
This great application is also available in iPhone. See user reviews here.

Visit: Aardvark
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4. Google Goggles


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One of the best technologies ever invented today is OCR or Optical Character Recognition. Digital photos of texts are converted into actual texts that text editors can read and edit. Google Goggles incorporates this technology so magnificently that even if it is still in its early stages, the things that you can do with it are already awesome. By taking a photo of an object whose name is unknown to you, Google Goggles magically tells you what it is. Enough of text queries where most of the time people don’t even know how to describe things.

Google Goggles works for business cards or documents with contact information where Goggles convert e-mails, phone number, address, name, etc. automatically for your comfort. Also perfect for tourists who can’t read or understand foreign signs and notices. By just taking a photo, the intelligible text is translated to your preferred language. Cool, right?

Admittedly, the technology is not yet complete, but the future it holds for the world is tantamount to the invention of wheel.

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5. Google Shopper


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Google Shopper has a feature similar to Google Goggles where real-life objects are recognized by Android phones. The deal with Google Shopper is that it enables users to instantly find reviews and several price quotes of items, including where to buy it. Taking a photo of an object and getting the information you need is a great time saver. Google Shopper also lets users scan barcodes on items.

No object to scan? Easy, Shopper has a speech recognition feature. Don’t forget to watch the video to get a good idea what Google Shopper does.

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6. Google Shared Spaces


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Shared Spaces basically brings people together to collaborate on any projects at hand. It is very easy to use and has lots of gadgets (or widgets) to choose ranging from polls to mind maps. Think of it as a conference room where you can add furniture and devices that will help you and your team plan.

However, too much serious matter is not also a good thing for productivity, Shared Spaces also has several games to choose from where the team can spend quality time together.

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7. Gesture Search


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Since applications are made to help people save time, although it only works for Android currently, this application is still worth mentioning. The rise of applications in the market is steady, people love them and would save as much as they can for their comfort.

A problem arises when there’s too much apps, just like on an unorganized geek’s desktop (do they even exist?) where 50-plus icons are scattered, time consumed in searching for a specific app is highly stressful. Now, imagine turning your Android phone’s touch screen into a screen-wide search machine which only requires that you "write" letters and/or numbers of the application you are looking for using your index finger (or pinky)? Works for contacts and music tracks too.

If there is one more thing we need to eliminate, that is stress from searching for your favorite game.

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8. Google Listen


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Probably one of the best experimental application to download or stream audio clips, news, and podcasts using your Android phone. Being an experimental app of Google Labs, it still has bugs that can be stressful at times. Sure enough, the creators are furiously whipping their flyswatter to satisfy people.

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9. Google Scribe


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Remember when you were in grade school and you had to recite a poem that you didn’t memorize well? Thank goodness a friend who sits at the front "suggests" what to say next and actually help you avoid embarrassment.

It is a usual occurrence for people to bring their writing to a halt simply because they don’t know what to write next. Google Scribe auto-suggests words and phrases that are compatible with your sentence structure. It is a great tool for writers and children to speed up the writing process. With today’s spell-checker and auto-suggest features, I bet it won’t be long before everyone becomes a good writer!

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10. Google News Timeline


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News Timeline works like Fast Flip in a way where it gives you what you want instantly, no need to bother browsing individual pages since they are already presented right in front of you. Google News Timeline works like a calendar where your search query’s results are plotted on the day of their occurrence, or publishing. Perfect for researchers and students. I don’t know what to say more about this amazing application because so far, this is my favorite of the bunch!

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